Friday, December 09, 2005

The Fluffy Dollars Holiday Drinking Game: Part 3

Okay. This week we're keepin' it simple.

Persisting Patriarchy: Drink every time you see a chubby white guy with a white beard wearing a red suit who wants to know if you've been "good."*

Pointless Consumerism: Drink every time you see one of those pointless made-up "dad" or "mom" gifts. You know, that stuff you see in the department stores in weird displays at the corners of the aisle? Things like: alarm clocks that look like giant golf balls, coin sorters, robot shaped telephones, oddly-formed and ineffectual "massage" pillows, supposed-to-make-some- mundane-task -easier-but-actually-makes-it harder gadgets a la Sharper Image's Automatic Eyeglass Cleaner , and ugly "decorative" items like this LumiSource Ribbon Electra Lamp.

WTF? It's a lamp that looks like a big sperm. Exactly what everyone wants for their living room.

*not to be confused with this bearded guy, who we like .

Check out past installments of the game here and here. Cheers, comrade!


Jenny said...

An automatic eyeglass cleaner? Does that really exist? Holy shit. And I thought multi-disc DVD players were bad. You know, for the people who are too lazy to get up off the couch after the first movie. If you can be bothered to rub your glasses against your shirt a few times, you've got problems.

Donny B said...

My favorite so far was a collection of golf-themed bar tools, like martini glasses with golf ball-shaped stems, and a serving bowl with a golf ball-shaped bass, etc. and it was all hundreds of dollars. needless to say, i bought all of it.