Eva Longoria
Who is Longoria? Does she fascinate? Repulse? What kind of being is she?
We don't watch the "Desperate Housewives," so we are depriving ourselves, no doubt, of some crucial information about Longoria... But we do read "In Touch" a lot, and we feel that this should be enough...
She looks like a startled child... or a nonplussed budgie... or like a Madam Toussaud's sculpture of Samantha Micelli...
She dated some of the most odious people in the history of celebrity... JC Chasez? She weighs 28 pounds... like Kelly Ripa, her claim to being beautiful seems to derive from the new standards promulgated by the Gnostic body haters in the dark satanic mills of celebrity hypemongering--if we must have bodies attached to our perky little faces, then at least let them be emaciated sunken-chest little boy bodies like the flexing rapscallions from Norman Rockwell magazine covers...
Longoria!!! What kind of beast are you? Longoria!!!
2 comments:
dude, she freaks me out too.
"flexing rapscallions"
awesome
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