Hey Jessica, will you be our friend?
Dear Jessica,
We loved watching you on Newlyweds, and we can't wait to see you in Dukes. But something has been on our mind for awhile. You have all the fame and power a girl could want. You're beautiful, smart (we read about your IQ in a magazine), and very successful despite having only a so-so voice. And while we give you credit for "performing" for the camera (we know you knew that wasn't chicken), we'd love it if you were a little more forthright and vocal about your budding feminism. We really feel like you are on the cusp of something.
Have you ever read that poem "Daddy" ? (might as well read "Lady Lazarus" while you're at it).
We think you might like it.
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